The sheer desperation of attempting to quell the aging process means that all great life crises often come with discovery of new hobbies. As the bank balance dries up and you eek out the very last of it, drinking shit wine in a Wetherspoons as an excuse for a “night out” staring into a glass which tastes of paint stripper, surrounded by old blokes with high blood pressure and wondering where it all went wrong, that’s where I found mine! 

It is at this lowest ebb that I decided…I like sports. Anyone who knows me, (take a breath, stem the laughter, stop being a dickhead) might find this to be a revelation since the most sporting prowess I have ever shown is running for cabs pissed on Clapham High St.

I partially blame my beloved dad who has been responsible for a routine of what I’m calling “rugby conditioning” since the age of about 1, sitting us in front of game after game in a desperate attempt to quell the disappointment that neither of his two daughters would likely turn into scrum halves for England.

Whilst my love for egg chasing perhaps not surprising, aided oh so greatly by the childish nostalgia of dad yelling at the tv, word perfect Nigel Owens impressions and my own perving over Robshaw / Ford / Brown…..even Haskell after a long day let’s be honest(!!!) I’ve surprised even myself with my new sports brain!!!

The summer has been corking (shocking England Euro performance asside obviously) and now amidst Rugby player thigh conisseuir I can list amateur Tennis umpire and “Gary Lineker with boobs” to the CV! Sure I might not know all the technical terms (Forehand, backhand, where’s your hand….) or know all the players (the one with the hair, the one who looks like Shrek, the one with the moth on his face…) but I can genuinely hold my hands up and say how much I’ve sincerely enjoyed Wimbledon, the odd Iceland and Wales match and all three beyond epic 2016 series games against the Wallabies.

With the Olympics just around the corner (vom..where have the last 4 years of my life gone?!?!) I  thought I should share I am looking forward.to becoming an annoying arm chair expert in several other sports (specific suggestions welcome)…and looking to recruit others to make me look like I have a legitimate gang of people to help me look like i know what im talking about down the local! so if you’d like to join me you will now be able to find me “daaaaan the pub” doing this alongside drinking beers and chanting phrases like “shoes off if you love Willis”! Lads lads lads….bants, bants, bants!!

Xx